I spend a lot of time online. Too much. Its quite hard to do anything else when you are confined to the bed or the sofa so much, as I have been for the last few months. Its that or the telly, especially when I find I can't read because my brain can't accept a page of text.
While visiting my mother the other weekend, having no internet connection whilst we were there meant that although I had taken my laptop with me (ostensibly to work), I didn't even open it once. My husband and I both came home feeling rested. I felt a clarity that I had not had before, a feeling of knowing who I am that comes from being inside myself, grounded in myself, rather than being in my head, or worse, out there flying about in the digital either. I'm an air sign so I really struggle with being present instead of going off in my head, making up stories or worrying about things that might never happen. Slogging all day on Tumblr or various blogs doesn't help. It just makes me feel inadequate and dissatisfied.
This the the time of year ruled by the element of Earth, a time for grounding and being present inside oneself. Despite being a writer, I'm feeling the increasing need to avoid my laptop. Any time I spend online makes me feel a bit sick afterwards, as if I've done something disgusting that I'm ashamed of. If I spend a day without looking at my computer I feel relaxed and productive. And I actually get stuff done!
I'm going to start treating myself to long stretches of time during the day when I don't go online. Maybe even have days when I don't check my email or facebook altogether. The idea feels good. Optimistic. Self-caring.
What would your life look like if you had a few digital-free days occasionally?